Yew Times 7
From Atlantic Roleplay Wiki
Title: Yew Times #7
Author: Yew Town Council
CURRENT NEWS
VIRTUOSO ISSUES
APOLOGY TO FANS
When troubador Emelio
Foscatini gave a concert
performance in Nu'jelm
eight months ago, he
announced to the delight
of listeners, that he
would be embarking on
the recomposition of his
father's lost Aria,
reconstructed from
memory, and to be
completed and performed
in a year's time. It is
with much regret that
Maestro Foscatini is
forced to relay the
unfortunate news to his
devotees, that he will be
unable to deliver on his
promise. When questioned,
Foscatini declined to
provide details on his
recent decision.
HOOKS OF THE SEA
Since time immemorable,
the oceans of our lands
have brought us fish,
dangers, and mystery. For
years, sailors brought
back tales of mysterious
monoliths, leading to the
discovery of the Serpent
Pillars that lead to the
Lost Lands. In days past,
murders would use boats
to roam the seas, preying
on fisherfolk or miners,
ransacking their ships' and
pillaging their goods. Since
the building of the
Floating Emporium, pirates
have been roaming the
waters once again to
attack seafarers.
Gargoyles would design
their own type of ship to
better withstand attacks
from the pirates as they
transported their cargo
across the oceans. Even
the orcs, watching the
battles from ashore would
set about with plans for
the construction of war
vessels for the purposes
of piracy and profit.
Despite all the dangers,
the fisherfolk would still
venture out to catch
thier fish in order to
feed thier families and
towns. Unbeknownst to
many was the existence
of an ancient society,
which recently revealed
themselves to the public.
Through their years of
efforts, they had devised
clever ways of catching
fish and documented the
many species of
crustaceans that thrive
on the bottom of the
oceans.
Their volumes of writings
educated the people on
the characteristics of the
different types of fish
and where they could be
caught. Where did the
Order of the Dragonfish
come from? Where do
they convene and study
the things they do? This
past week, they unveiled
several new types of fish
hook, previously unseen by
the public. These items
seem to possess
specialized magical
properties, wearing out
after so many uses. I
wonder if these Fish
Monger's know what is
behind the recent
phenomena alarming
sailors; the ships and
traps that are sucked
below the waters surface,
and the titanic difting
shadows passing below
that have unerved even
the most veteran mariner.
HEROIC CHICKEN SAVES
TODDLER
Emily the chicken is
celebrated as a hero
today, following her
rescue of the family's 22
month old toddler who
fell from the dock into
the pond on their
property. Emily began to
cluck frantically which
drew the attention of
the boy's mother, Livia
Greenwell, who was doing
housework and had not
noticed the child's
disappearance. Greenwell
asserted that before she
could react, the plucky
chicken launched itself
into the water, and
chickenpaddled the boy to
shore. The boy has been
examined by a local
healer, and will not
require any additional
treatment.
STARGAZING SCHOLARS
CALL FOR END TO
SHENANIGANS
Mages in Moonglow are
sending out a message to
the wise-cracker who is
putting black ink on the
eyepiece of the great
telescope to cease and
desist immediately.
Heironymous, chief
astronomer in Moonglow
conveys this message,
"The whole black eye gag
was a bit humorous at
first; even I got a
chuckle out of it. But
it's been several weeks
now, and it's already
become a bit tiresome."
There are no current
leads on the identity of
the prankster.
PUBLIC SERVICE
MESSAGE
TAVERN NIGHT
On the date of
08/08/11 at 9pm
eastern, Tavern Night will
be held at The Lush
House which it's
coordinates are 170* 9'S
25* 56'w in [Ter Mur]
LOOKING FOR LOVE?
Are you looking for the
sort of woman who is a
faithful campanion, lover,
protector, and
housekeeper and still
haven't found her yet?
Maybe, it's time that you
gave Orc Bride Match-ups
the chance to match you
up with the perfect orc
female to suit your
needs. Let's discuss the
many advantages of such
a relationship. First, orc
brides are loyal and never
venture far from their
home, so you'll always
know where she is at any
given time of the day.
Secondly, they are
meticulous in the
maintenance of their dens;
their strength allows
them to lift heavy
furniture and sofas while
they sweep under them.
Third, orc women won't
fake a headache when
they aren't in the mood,
because they are always
in the mood for hot
zugzug. Orc women are
great nocturnal hunters.
If you leave the window
open wide enough for
them to crawl through at
night, they will often
return later with a fresh
killed stag in their jaws,
or a slain boar to lay at
the foot of your bed. In
short time she will have
paid herself off in
grocery savings alone. And
the list goes on. So, if
you are in the market
for a bride that will last,
then stop into one of
our offices and see what
we have to offer you.
TODAY'S SAFETY TIP
ABOUT KEEPING YOUR
LANTERNS BURNING AT
NIGHT:
Don’t be a fool when
choosing fuel, to keep
your lantern burning
bright. So, fill your lamp
with Captain DeCamp,
When you bed down for
the night.
Captain DeCamp Fish Oil.
Burns longer. Burns
safer.
FROM THE STAFF
We here at Yew Times
thought it is time to
acknowledge the people
who helped bring the
completion of the first
seven papers so far.
Publisher: Yew Town
Council
Editors: Mongo, Corithian,
SunWolf,
Reporters or Story
Writers : Corithian,
SunWolf, Mongo, Garrett
Granth
We also like to thank
the people who advertised
within the papers.
Silverfox, how enjoys
selling things on his
vendors named Silverfox
around the lands and can
be found at Luna Bank
at times. He also has his
own auction on Sunday at
five eastern time.
Golden Fang Casino, with
the sloth machines open
all the time, and the
card games depending on
a dealer. It can be a fun
way to lose gold or to
win alot of gold. The
odds are truely on your
luck.
Publish 2
Edition 7, 6-31-2011