What Would Poet Do?
From Atlantic Roleplay Wiki
Title: What Would Poet Do?
Author: Silent Poet
I decided since I get asked my advice on many different things to establish some answers to the most commonly asked questions.
I thought perhaps a few reponses to some of life's dilemma's might be helpful.
I hope you enjoy.
1. What would Poet do if someone hated him?
"Not by hate is hate defeated..." unless you can kill the other person first. This is of course assuming having a pint and talking about it would be to no avail.
2. What would Poet do to hold his tongue?
Grab the nearest pint and/or lass... (which exempts Molly).
3. What would Poet do if faced by superior numbers in battle?
Lift my kilt and use my equipment to open a bottle of ale and offer them a drink.
4. What would Poet do if he has no money in his pouch?
I bless my nearest audience with my longest most boring epic poem, until some friend blesses me with a drink.
5. What would Poet do about gettting angry at fools?
I usually leave the Hostel about that time. For some reason Sanctus members don't generally come to our lands.
7. What would Poet do to get revenge on his hated foe(s)?
Seduce all his women, even the elderly, and take all his sheep and leave Tai the keys to his wine cellar. 8. What would Poet do about adultery?
I try to avoid the husband if at all possible, but if I do see him, I always offer a drink and try to be sure and not drop his wife's garments from my money pouch.
9. What would Poet do about getting drunk?
I tend to avoid the taverns where Tai might have been earlier that evening. No point in drinking if there is nothing to drink. Otherwise, the ultimate answer about how to handle drink is: if you can still hold on the floor, you are not too drunk.
10. What would Poet do about material possessions?
If I can't drink it, or seduce it, and it won't help keep me alive... I tend to give it away.
11. What would Poet do about prostitution?
I would refuse to pay Molly's outrageous fees, and find me a nice lass who didn't charge by the pigeon.
12. What would Poet do when caught red-handed?
I tend to comfort the husbands and fathers and sheep herders with this: "She cried out your name, not mine."
13. What would Poet do about killing? If it is necessary or deserving, I give no mercy. Besides, I might spill my tankard if the fight drags out.
14. What would Poet do if the lass says, no? Find one that says, yes. I am not without certain charms.
15. What would Poet do about an angry mob.
The key here is misdirection. I keep a llama handy to send running one way and I duck the other. Or when absolutely unavoidable, I send Tai out into the mob in a dress. He has handsome legs, not as pretty as mine, but he cuts a dashing figure in a dress.
(obvious ale stain on page as ink is smeared into obscurity)