Yew Times 17
From Atlantic Roleplay Wiki
Title: Yew Times #17
Author: Yew Town Council
SCHOLARS DISCOVER OLDER HALLOWEEN PRECIDENT
For years now, many of
the inhabitants of this
land have considered the
celebration of Halloween
to have been brought
over by Lord British
when he first came to
this land from his native
Earth. However, a recent
discovery by scholars of
Sosarian archives indicate
that our ancestors have
been observing this
tradition long before the
days of the first
cataclysm. Back then it
was referred to as
Griefing Day, and has
since evolved into the
form that we practice
today. The practices of
the customs, however
continue in several ways,
though many have
forgotten the original
message. Before the
virtues tempered the
hearts of men, the people
were a sick, barbarous
lot; wantonly inflicting
abuses upon each other,
until it reached a point
where progress was being
hindered by these
constant, malicious antics.
It was decided that one
day a year would be set
aside for this behavior,
and those who wished not
to participate, would
ensconce themselves inside
their houses until the day
had safely passed. Not to
be deprived of victims,
the mean-spirited would
devise schemes such as
setting fire to a burning
sack of excrement which
would be placed on the
victim's doorstep as they
knocked on the door then
hid. Oft times, the
prankster would be
spotted snickering behind
some cover, recognized
and mercifully beaten on
his own doorstep the
following day; thus
resulting in the innovation
of the Griefing Day
disguise. The Holiday
Celebratory Council
enacted several changes in
the custom, including the
prohibition of any use of
arson to provoke the
homeowner from leaving
his home. Long gone are
the days where one would
witness resident and
guest grappling with
deadly intent at the
threshold of a home.
Nowadays, a trick or
treater is content to
receive a mild shanking at
the doorway or have
paint thrown into his or
her face. The traditional
holiday greeting evolved
from flipping the bird to
a more cheerful "trick or
treat." The greeting itself
became manditory following
a series of incidents
whereupon a number of
hapless door to door
encyclopedia salesmen were
killed by uptight
homeowners on the fated
holiday in cases of
mistaken identity. Today,
the hostility of the
occasion is greatly toned
down, but there still
lingers the residual
ancient emnity between
resident and holiday
extortionist. Spouses have
long done away with the
custom of handing out
poisoned bottles of wine
to visitors and have
contented themselves with
doling out foul pitchers
of milk that have been
patiently curdling in the
pantry since the beginning
of the month, or
distributing the specially
formulated pain wrenching
candy that sends a rictus
of agony through one's
skull when consumed.
Gifts of miniature iron
maidens and guillotines
hearken back to the days
when disgruntled victims
would threaten pranksters
with torture or
decapitation. When these
customs are viewed in
the light of latest
findings, it seems to lend
proof to the old addage
of the more that things
change, the more they
remain the same.
EXPERTS LOOK INTO
PAST PHENOMENOM
What ever happened to
the phantom towers that
veterans say used to
appear in the lands of
Yew and just as
mysteriously fade into
nothingness? That's what
paranormal investigators
want to know. Travellers
would sometimes speak of
the odd towers that
would briefly appear along
the coast, but such tales
are no longer heard in
these times. Was it all a
hoax, or were these just
urban legends? Or, is
there just no more
vacant space for a
spectral fortress to
manifest anymore in this
day and age? If any of
our readers have
experienced such sightings,
our staff would be
interested in hearing your
account.
SURVIVAL TIPS FROM
THE FIELD
Hunting with DeadBob
On a recent jaunt into
Demon Valley, Lord Virus,
our provisionary, brought
10 bottles of whiskey, 12
cases of ale and 2
packages of fish steaks.
"Virus," Lord Gandolf
asked him, "What are we
going to do with all them
damn hotdogs?"
After a liquid lunch, we
were off to slay demons
when a paragon suddenly
spawned and bit off Lord
Virus' codpiece. Most of
us managed to get away
clean. But if you see
happen to see Lord Virus
sporting a codpiece with
bite-marks, and, missing
his left buttock, we can
explain. As we were
running away from that
paragon, all of us stopped
to put on running shoes.
All except Virus, that is.
He didn't have any.
"Why are you putting on
your running shoes?" he
asked. "Do you really
think you are going to
out run that demon with
those?"
To which we replied over
our shoulders as we sped
off, "We don't have to
out run the demon. We
just have to out run
you!"
- db
A figure dressed in
green, blending into the
colors that surround it,
made its way to the
center of Yew. Standing
by the portal leading to
the Elven city, one that
was not there in ages
passed, pulled the hood of
her cloak back revealing
the features of a human
female. Tall and slender
she was, with a shape
and presence that would
and does catch the
attention of many.
She knew of the days
when this town was
bustling with activity, for
she was young then and
so very wide eyed taking
it all in. The majority of
her days spent never
really knowing if the
choices she made were
the right ones in those
special times, she smiled
almost to herself. She
recalled learning two
important and special
things about these lands
of Sosaria: we would
never grow old, and never
truly die.
Focusing on those days
her eyes closed slowly as
the sights and sounds
came washing over her...
Men in green armor
running to and fro,
welcoming new citizens to
their lands, or guarding it
with their lives. Many a
time forcing the
Stormreaver Orc hordes
back to their fort south
of Yew, or other times
fighting off a more
sinister foe, men that
had gone red from the
spilling of so much blood.
She closed her eyes
tighter as she drifted
even further back in
time, a time when she
met great new friends,
and lovers, having
wonderful adventures
around the forests of
Yew, or even more risky
times in the carernous
dungeons of Wrong.
Suddenly her nose took in
a scent, a distinct smell
causing her to remember
the winerys of Yew,
where often she would
drink with fellow
adventureres, or even
foes.
Her hand went to her
cheek as her eyes open,
wiping away at the tears.
She so hated that about
these lands and thought
to herself why do these
wonderful vibrant
memories have to bring
about such a torrent of
emotions always seemingly
ending in grief? Her eyes
caught a piece of paper
nailed to a tree, was it
a bounty for a
murderer?? No, of course
not, those days had long
since passed when you
could bring a murderer's
head back to town and
collect a tidy sum slaying
him for his crimes.
She further cleared her
eyes, what was this? She
began to read:
OCTOBERFEST 2011
On the last Thursday &
Friday of the month of
October (the 27th &
28th) the A Sosarian
Empire Alliance will be
hosting an event located
at the center of Yew
(Trammel). Enjoy new
adventures... meet with
old friends and
acquaintances, and make
new ones as we have
planned two evenings with
a focus on enjoyment and
fond memories.
Join us on Thursday at
730 pm eastern time to
enter into the Halloween
Costume contest (hosted
by Clan Moor) followed by
the Box Stacking Event
relying on your wits to
be the first to finish
(rules provided at event
sight / hosted by the
Vampiric Order) and the
last event of the evening
the Boozefest - you just
have to be there to
believe and enjoy this
riddlefest of booze and
questions (hosted by the
A Sosariian Alliance Event
Master Corinthian (YEW).
And on Friday test your
skills firing small, sharp
wooden sticks at targets
in the Archery contest
at 8pm eastern (hosted
by YEW), followed by the
Amazing Yew Race race
against time (hosted by
TWT & H*W) and top it
all off with a Halloween
Dinner (hosted by the
Serpents Cross Tavern
and their renowned
catering crew.
Hope to see you all
there.