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Thrax · Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 6:22 pm Post subject: A Moment of Doubt

Thrax wasn't sure just what it was that woke him up suddenly in the night. Whether it was the rustling of the curtains as the inrush of a breeze blew through the open windows of his bedchamber, or the loud, wailing, howl of a wolf pack as they closed in on some hapless prey... he did not know. Or was it really something else?

He got out of bed and walked quietly to the windows, neither noticing the full, glowing, orb of Trammel, nor the rays that glinted off the placid waters of the bay far below.

What was this game he was playing? On one hand, he had his avowed loyalty to the Regency, something he had only dared dream of in time past. On the other, his recent commitment and collusion with Oggaroth and the Dark Order. And he stood in between, like some man trapped between two stone monoliths that threatened to crush him from both sides into pulp.

Where did true loyalties now lie? The web of deceit upon deceit, lie upon lie, of improvised and contradictory plans, plied upon the other like a tangled mass from which he might never extricate himself; immovable, choking him, fraying his nerves to the breaking point.

What had happened to the life he had planned for them, Ishtar, the children and himself... of the many warm, sunlit, days together, knowing neither worry nor fear save that which was one's normal lot in life; those that came by some unseen and unprovoked misfortune? How could that dream be realized now?

He turned back to gaze upon his lovely wife who lay sleeping soundly, and then it happened; his mind settled as he watched her slow breathing. Looking at her, the purpose for all his doings became clear as crystal as it distilled in his mind...

I do it for her. For them. Even Yew... for them... to secure their legacy. I do it all to protect them... to keep them from danger, harm, or death. I will not let them know what I have known. I would destroy the world to keep them safe.

Satisfied and dispelling all misgivings, he went back to bed and to quiet slumber.