Atlantic Roleplay Community Boards

Gorgon

Ahhh... Our Story unfolds in Moonglow. What's this? It seems that today is the day of Finneas the Goatherd....

...a day of tradition and honor passed down through the ages. Yes, Town Council members would, by the thousands, frolick and dance through the streets in frilly pink lingerie, prompting "Customers" to buy their "wares" at extremely low prices... Well, I don't know why I'm veiling it. We all know about the Amorous tendencies of those Glowpugs!

As such, I went undercover. Yes, your favorite Orcy went incognito as none other than Greypawn himself. As some of you may know, Greypawn plays for the other team. He eats his fish steaks with extra "Tartar Sauce". Many prominent players have found themselves tied up in his bedroom as "Guests". He enjoys hot tubbing with Faith. Are you getting it yet?

Thinking that this was some sort of sign or attempt to push the gay Agenda firmly into the hearts of Atlantians. Fearing the worst....

...A world where the males dominate completely and all women live in chains.... oh wait... hehe.... well.... that's not so bad, I suppose... Chains.... BUT MOVING ON!

As the Orcish stimuli is introduced to Fong, he becomes.... well... if you look close, you can plainly see the pupils dilating.... the increased salivation.... the giving off of Pheremones... Let's just say that, for all of you psychology majors out there, his Sympathetic Nervous System is going haywire!

The tension breaks! The inner beast in Fong is released! His hormones explode inward! For a split second, the only sounds that are heard are Vaen Swiftar using his L33T hacks to gun down half of UO. Yes, Half. And then Fong is on Gorgon! Hurling fiery spells at him to sweeten the mood! ..Offering to buy him dinner.... a Swedish back massage... well.. um... COME ON GUYS, HOW COULD I RESIST THAT? =( Don't look at me with your accusing eyes, you bastards! I took a hit for the team!

A bit later, Gorgon dispensed with the disguise.

It's true the Glowpugs are mean!

Someone grabs Gorgon's behind and says something lude.

I'm not just some playtoy people can pick up when they need. I'm like a sweet delicate flower.

I have feelings too! Telling me that you want to smother me in Dwarves and dive on me like a Japanese Kamikaze pilot can only get you so far with me! I mean, Gorgon isn't one for subtlety, and that does have a kind of allure to it, but it just sounds painful, quite frankly.

Moving on, though! Very Happy

Gorgon gets down to business! His intentions are as clear and pristine as Toni's virginity:

I know what you're thinking: "Gorgon has Magic Powers? And special abilities?" The answer is yes. You see, years ago, I had X-ray eyes implanted. With these marvelous inventions, I can look through anything without any fear at all. I'm a real hit at Airports, as you may guess!

The night progresses, as usual. The Umbrans tossed loosely-laced sexual innuendo at me. (No Orion, I don't want to see your "Ninja Star," You damn Pervert!) Doireann stripped nekkid and did that ceiling fan trick with her legs that makes it sound like choppers flying over the Makon Delta. My Agent Orange starting kicking in a bit, but I ended up alright.

A dramatic Chord echoes across both space and time as a Glowpug says, "I think it's time for you to go, Gorgon. You're drunk."

Gorgon had, in the most polite way possible, complimented a young woman on her virile femininity.

Or taken a swing at royalty. I can't remember, I was a bit inebriat-

AHEM.

Either way, Gorgon wasn't concealing his feeling or anything! Gorgon then answers the Officer's repeated request with a composed and Diplomatic Answer:

In all of my experience, I'd have to say that telling an Officer that he can't enforce his laws on me because he's out of his jurisdiction would have to be by far the best reply. Top if off with, "butthole!" or some such thing and you've got a recipe for success. Try it sometime when you get a speeding ticket! I promise it will work wonders!

Gorgon resists their attempts to carry him off!

But even with all of his struggles, Gorgon is being boxed in! Is this the dreaded ritual he had heard so much about? Is this the Moonglow Circlejerk of Doom?! OH BY THE GOD'S, THEY'RE REACHING INTO THEIR ROBES! Gorgon is left with one option! He must Take the Ring. The one ring to rule them all... and use it, uncaring about the consequences.
With a cry, Gorgon slips the ring over his finger...

...And disappears. Gorgon was lucky this time. But will he be lucky next time? Find out in our Next Episode!!

Vincent and Deathwynd Umbra: There's more than one way to Woo a Vampire!

Also in the works-

See Doireann in her stunning comeback, "Why Am I Wearing This?"

and

See Tatiana in, "Tatiana Gone Wild: Sticks And Stones May Break My Bones, But Needles and Sewing Excite Me!"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
I hope everyone enjoys this Episode. For the record, I am and forever will be a member of the Gay/Straight Alliance! Equality and Freedom to all!

If you liked my work, please drop a line here! My Ego needs Fuel!

If you have an idea for a future episode, please ICQ me at 129391671!
_________________
"Meh Sware Lulty tu da Bludgod"
-Gorgon, 2000

Teh Glouris Lrod Kujabis · Transcendent Spammer Joined: 29 Dec 2003 Posts: 5740

Flawless victory.

Cal Hurst · Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 7:19 pm Post subject:

Hahaha.

Awesome. <3
_________________

Starfire · Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 7:35 pm Post subject: Tatiana gone wild?

You are absolutely priceless Gorgon. It was absolutely great. But, Tati gone wild? Sewing and needles excite me? Although, she did win the fruit eating contest at the garden........
_________________
aka: Tatiana Thorn nee Alexi; Summer Kane; Ivory Skyfire; and others

Alessandra · Babbling Loony Joined: 30 Dec 2003 Posts: 2650

ahh yes... the grapes and the peaches and the watermelons...

Very Happy

and just think what would happen at a dessert eating contest! Cool

_________________
Ken: I don't put anything in my mouth I don't intend on swallowing...

Ken: I put it any way I want to, cause that is the kind of man I am...

Toni/Gwyn/Dae ‎(11:22 AM):
well I was doing Beo, but he annoyed me lol

[09:37] Leshok: i think dancing is like sex, don't let one bad partner ruin it for the rest of your life

Merci d'Rue · Babbling Loony Joined: 18 Jan 2006 Posts: 2810

*LAUGHS* yay I am so releived it was her that got dragged into this story and not I!

The fact is that I maintain my innocent nature! Dory is the troublemaker!

*Hopes there are no pics of the bone pit incident*
_________________
May destiny guide you...

Gorgon · Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 8:51 pm Post subject: hehehe

I'm sure I can dig up some screenshots of you being naughty, if need be. ^^
_________________
"Meh Sware Lulty tu da Bludgod"
-Gorgon, 2000

NOT Malorn · Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 9:43 pm Post subject:

You are truely a god among the orc. Four thumbs up. Though, I see right through you with my not so x-ray vision... phoney.

Gorgon · Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 11:25 pm Post subject: Rawr =D

Thankee thankee ^^
_________________
"Meh Sware Lulty tu da Bludgod"
-Gorgon, 2000

Doireann · Posted: Sat Jan 20, 2007 3:34 am Post subject:

I claim total innocence!!!

Wonderful, though. X-ray vision my... *smiles innocently*

Orion · Journeyman Joined: 02 Jun 2006 Posts: 230

Would you like to see my ninja star?

Gorgon · Posted: Sun Jan 21, 2007 12:54 pm Post subject: HAR

Oh Doire.... *Smiles innocently*

AND ORION-

_________________
"Meh Sware Lulty tu da Bludgod"
-Gorgon, 2000

Orion · Journeyman Joined: 02 Jun 2006 Posts: 230

It wasn't me, I swear...
^.^

Xandria · Posted: Sun Jan 21, 2007 2:04 pm Post subject:

Oh, good. I'm not the only one who will be embaressed by this orc.

Poor Orion. He has more on you, doesn't he?

Gorgon · Posted: Sun Jan 21, 2007 2:27 pm Post subject: MRowl

I'm an Orc. It's my responsibility to get dirt on people and then exploit it for funnies =D
_________________
"Meh Sware Lulty tu da Bludgod"
-Gorgon, 2000